Optional Rituals
Box, Wine, and Love Letter Ceremony
Brianna and Mike, as a couple you crafted a strong wooden box that will
hold a bottle of wine and two wine glasses. In addition, you each wrote a
letter to one another, expressing your thoughts about the good qualities
that you have found in your future partner, as well as your reasons for
falling in love with each other. You did not read each other’s letter and
you placed them in the box with the wine and glasses.
Mike and Brianna, should you ever find your marriage enduring serious
difficulties, I am asking that before you make and irrational decisions, that
you both, as a couple, open the bos, drink some wine together, and then
venture off into separate rooms to read the letters that you wrote to one
another when you were united as a couple. by reading these love letters,
you will reflect upon the reasons that you fell in love with each other in the
first place. The hope here is that there will never be a reason for you to
open this box, unless of course, it is for your 25th anniversary.
***
Hand-Fasting Ceremony
We now enter into the ceremony of Hand-Fasting:
(Bride) and (Groom) have chosen to enact the ancient and yet beautiful symbolic ritual of Hand-Fasting.
Friends and family, for those that are unaware of what a Hand-Fasting is… Our ancestors from ancient times knew a few things about relationships, so they came up with Hand-Fasting. If a union of two people was not already an arranged marriage, and love was the driving force of their wanting to be together, the village elders would arrange a Hand-Fasting, a trial run at marriage. A Hand-Fasting would be a legal, binding marriage for a year and a day. This was done so that one, any children born of the relationship would be completely legitimate, and two, if the couple were found to be incompatible with each other, the marriage would be dissolved with no ill consequences.
Traditionally during the ceremony, the couple’s hands are bound together with one or more ribbons, symbolizing the desire for the couple to be united. Hence the term, bound or hitched, literally.
(you can use one cord and proceed skipping the following numerous ribbons)
The ribbon colors have special meanings.
First, we begin with a White Linen Cloth symbolizing the embodiment of (Bride) and (Groom’s) lives, to represent the union of two into one.
I am presenting a piece of Silver to represent Prosperity and Abundance.
Each color ribbon has its own meaning and significance and is presented by family and friends that represent these attributes.
I call forth the Black ribbon: pure love, wisdom, success and strength as embodied by (name of person).
I call forth the Blue ribbon: fidelity, longevity, strength and safe journey as embodied by (name of person).
I call forth the Brown ribbon: Nurturing, home and hearth and healing as embodied by (name of person).
I call forth the Gold ribbon: wisdom, prosperity, and longevity as embodied by (name of person).
I call forth the Grey ribbon: balance and neutrality as embodied by (name of person).
I call forth the Green ribbon: fertility, growth, love, luck, prosperity and nurturing as embodied by (name of person).
I call forth the Orange ribbon: kindness, encouragement, adaptability and attraction as embodied by (name of person).
I call forth the Pink ribbon: love, happiness, unity, romance, honor and truth as embodied by (name of person).
I call forth the Purple ribbon: spiritual strength, power, health and healing as embodied by (name of person).
I call forth the Red ribbon: passion, love, courage, strength, health and vigor as embodied by (name of person).
I call forth the Silver ribbon: protection, inspiration, vision and creativity as embodied by (name of person).
I call forth the White ribbon: purity, serenity, peace, truth and devotion as embodied by (name of person).
I call forth the Yellow ribbon: harmony, balance, attraction and confidence as embodied by (name of person).
(Bride) and (Groom), I bid you to look into each other’s eyes. Will you honor and respect one another and seek to never break that honor?
We Will
Will you share each other’s pain and seek to ease it?
We Will
Will you share the burdens of each other, so that your spirits may grow in this union?
We Will
Will you share each other’s laughter and look for the brightness in life and the positive in each other?
We Will
And so the Binding is made.
(Bride) and (Groom), as your hands are bound together, now so are your lives and spirits joined in a union of Love and Trust.
***
Love Letter Box
Jaime and Chris, together as a couple, you chose this ritual, this strong wooden box that contains a bottle of fine red wine and two sturdy wine glasses. In addition, you each wrote a love letter to one another, expressing your thoughts about the good qualities that you have found in each other, your future life long partner, as well as your visions for your marriage, your experience of falling in love with each other. You did not read each other’s letter, and you have placed them in this wedding ceremony box with the wine and glasses.
Chris and Jaime, should you ever find your marriage enduring serious difficulties, I am asking that before you make any permanent decisions to separate, that you both, as a couple, open this Box, relax, drink some wine together and then venture off into separate rooms to read these letters that you wrote to one another as you approached your wedding date. By reading these love letters, you will reflect upon the essence of your love, your experience of falling in love, your reasons for making these vows together. Remembrance of this truth might assist you find your way, your return onto your path, into your heart of love once again. The hope is that there will never be a need for you to open this box, unless of course, it is in celebration of your 25th wedding anniversary.
Jaime and Chris, I now ask that each of you take a nail, one at a time and Hammer this love letter box closed. It is complete.
***
Unity Candle
The unity candle ceremony is offered to symbolize the joining together of the two families, and their love for the bride and the groom, into one united family that loves the new husband and wife. It is also symbolizes the union of two individuals, becoming one in commitment.
I would like to invite the bride and grooms fathers up to light the unity candles representing the two families.
Heather and Dimas;
and two become one.
***
Sand Ceremony
I will begin Corina and Andrew’s sand ceremony by pouring white sand into this vessel to represent the foundation of love in your relationship.
Today you are making a life-long commitment to share the rest of your lives with each other.
Your relationship is symbolized through the pouring of these two individual containers of sand; each representing all that you were, all that you are, and all that you will ever be.
Each of you are unique in beauty, strength, and character. Blended together, you both create a new and extraordinary love relationship.
Each grain of sand, each aspect of your individuality, brings to your marriage a blend of divine humanity that forever enriches the unity of your life together.
You may now blend the sand together symbolizing the uniting of the bride and groom into one.
The life that each of you have experienced until now, individually, will hereafter be inseparably united, for the two shall become one. Just as these grains of sand can never be separated and poured again into the individual containers, so will your marriage be; sealed in love.
***
Hand Ceremony
Dimas, facing Heather, please hold her hands, palms up, so that you may see the gift that they are to you.
These are the hands that will hold yours as you joyfully journey through this life together. These are the caring hands that will hold you when you get lost, need strength and are searching for your way. These are the hands that will cradle your children and raise them up. These are the hands that will comfort you when you are sick and console you when you are grieving. These are the hands that will passionately love you and cherish you through all the years, for a lifetime of shared memories.
Heather, please hold Dimas’s hands, palms up, so that you may see the gift that they are to you.
These are the hands that will work side by side with yours to create your dreams together. These are the hands that will hold your family as it grows. These are the hands that will applaud your academic efforts. These are the hands that will countless times wipe the tears from your eyes, tears of joy and sorrow. These are the hands that will comfort you in illness and support you in celebration. These are the nurturing hands that will hold yours as you fall more and more in love with each other.
***
Ringing Bells
Celtic folks believe that ringing the church bells loudly will ward off evil spirits. Over time, many have incorporated two bells and a bow or flowers in their wedding invitations and related symbols of matrimony.
***
Water Ritual
There is a saying in Eastern tradition that when you have love, even plain water is sweet. The clear water that you share today reflects the beauty and simplicity that is available to you both in remembering and devoting yourselves to the principal of love in your marriage. May it grow sweeter with each passing year. You may now drink from this fountain of love. (Couple gives each other a drink from the same glass)
***
Smudging Ceremony
“love is a communion of your unity with each other; of your relation to those who are part of your circle of caring, of your ties to the earth, to air and water and fire. To life itself; love is a communion, the circle within which we all live and move and have our being.”
Blessed Be
***
Honoring with Flowers
Clearing with Sage
In cultures all over the world the ritual burning of incense, herbs and sacred sage has been used as a purification of bride and groom, family and ceremony sites.
Today we open and release into Aimee and Greggs wonderful future path of marriage, we offer our blessings to their beloved children Adelaide and Grant and their cherished family Scot and Sharon, and their special friend Candace. We are together in this incredible place on the planet sharing this brilliant Sunday morning in celebration of love. Together, let us call in our hearts, call in the elements of nature which support our lives here in this blessed moment.
***
Calling in our Directions
We call in the the spirits of the East.
Bright clear light of the morning.
Essence of new beginnings.
We asked for your clarity, your vision, your crystalline peaks of inspiration for these two souls as they travel round this circle of life.
Ho and welcome Spirit of the East.
We call in the spirits of the South.
The shining sun with its intoxicating, magnetic warmth, the exuberant joy of noontime, of childhood play, of vibrant energy and fiery release. We lift our faces to your rays of illumination and thank you for our healthy happy lives.
Ho and welcome spirits of the South.
We call in the spirits of the West,
Grateful for the waters that flow through our veins, that we feel in our mouth, the emotional depth of your wisdom. Your tidal pulls, cradling us, challenging us, let us swim in your universal stream, be in this river of life together.
Ho and welcome spirits of the West.
We call in the spirits of the North.
Grandmother, Grandfather, ancestors of the earth. Let us sink our feet into your land, grateful for the nurturing soil that grows our food, our sustenance. Let us remember where we came from, who we came from, where we are going.
Ho and welcome spirits of the North.
We call in the sprits of above, and below, the shining ones within us and all-around us in this great and wondrous universe, and always we call in the spirits of our heart center. Our truest guide. May we always listen and honor our truth. Blessed be.
***
Singing Bowl Love Meditation
Buddhist teacher Thich Nhat Hanh offers:
~ "When you love someone, the best thing you can offer is your presence. How can you love if you are not there?" ~
Find a comfortable spot and let gravity settle you into a relaxation of your bodies and your minds.
Gently closing your eyes, allow yourself to be
cradled, supported, still…
become aware of your breathing,
notice where you feel your breath,
allowing that to be your homebase,
your touch stone
to this Present Moment…
present to yourself, to those you love, to life.
slowing down and entering into a timeless time.
rest in this space of consciousness
Being aware of thoughts, feelings and sensations as they arrive
witness whatever arises and changes and passes away…
come back, to begin again,
breath, sounds, sensations
your heart beating
your love for self and another.
***
Gong
I invite you now to witness the person you love, and with this mindfulness, with this awareness, look into each others eyes, facing each other, with body, mind and spirit,
Offering the simple fullness of these words,
a mantra of love,
“Dear one, I am here for you.”
Please stand.
***
Family Vows
Now that you have heard Hanna and Ryan recite their vows, please show your support by responding to the following with the words:
We do
Do you their family and friends, promise, from this day
forward to encourage them, love them, and to support
them in the promises that they have made?
We do!!!!
***
Remembrance
The uniting of Heather and Dimas is an important and memorable event. This is a time of celebration for all who know and love them.
At this time, I would like to offer a moment of remembrance to bring into this circle of love the spirit of Heathers grandparents Eula and Fred Whitt as well as, Dimas' grandpa Luis Garcia and Uncle Ira Guevara.
In truth, We Know, our loved ones are always with us, in our hearts, in uplifting spirit and we honor them and we are thankful for their continual blessings. In this spirit of joy, let us all welcome Heather and Dimas to the spiritual and very human undertaking that is to be their marriage.
***